Are Iranians the friendliest people? (29/12/2021)

(29/12/2021)

Although I have been to many places in the world, I have never travelled to Iran. I do, however, have a reliable source of information--my mother. First, let me provide a little background. My mother was a career educator in Hong Kong. She retired thirty years ago and, for all these years, had travelled the world. She loved travelling and had visited every nook and cranny on earth. Another thing about my mother is her worldview as a diehard redneck to the right of Proud Boys. America is paradise, it is being destroyed by "evil" China and illegal immigrants from Mexico, and Dubya Bush and MAGA Trump are superheroes who will save America. This is no joke. My mother belonged to a large group, maybe a majority, of educators who had been teaching the young minds of Hong Kong. They are also government employees paid with public funds. Anyone who had visited the Hong Kong Teachers Association and seen the vitriolic anti-China posters there would understand. The organization had decided to disband after the Hong Kong government implemented the China Sedition Law. (Note: the HKTA used to be non-political until after June of 1989)

With this in mind, we should appreciate before visiting Iran, my mother had already been inculcated with an ingrained and immutable idea of the "evil" Iran in her mind, thanks to the excellent work of the mainstream media (MSM). One might say she did not hate all Iranians, as she adored the Shah. My mother visited while Iran was in some sort of social upheaval. The mainstream news was filled with images of angry protesters demonstrating in Tehran (that was over 10 years ago, and I don’t remember the exact occasion or timing). Travel warnings filled the airwaves, and tour groups to Iran were cancelling left and right. My mother, at 95 years of age, was and still is a fearless traveller (in the midst of the Covid explosion, she recently flew to Newark by herself, and afterwards, to Florida and back with my sister’s family, now spending New Year’s Eve at Princeton). Her Iran tour group had been delayed earlier, but this time she insisted on going, and somehow enough people in the group decided to go. So, away she went.

My mother has a failing memory now. She has also mellowed somewhat. Only about a month ago, I asked her, of all the places she visited, which country had the nicest people. To my surprise, the answer was Iran. Not only Iran, but she said, by far Iran. I cried, "What? Explain."

Interestingly, the first thing my mother said was after her trip to Iran, she would not trust mainstream news anymore. She said after landing in Tehran, the group was told not to visit a certain district where protesters were allowed to hold their demonstrations. Otherwise, the city was calm, peaceful, and fun. At no time did she notice or feel any dangers or disquiet. The mainstream media were warping the viewing public's reality, creating the image of an Iran descending into chaos. Okay, for some of us who have visited and even lived in "evil" China, we know about the relentless mainstream media lies, but what makes my mother think Iranians are the nicest? Did the insidious mullahs brainwash her?

Although my mother sometimes travelled to different countries with tour groups (she actually travelled to many places by herself, but at 95, her adventuring days are pretty much over), she seldom, if not never, took local tours to visit the regular tourist traps. To her credit, she liked interacting with people and observing them. While others in her group would visit the museums, historical sites, and souvenir shops, my mother would wander off by herself to the nearest park, for example, and check out the ordinary people living their regular lives.

So, on this day in Tehran, my mother was sitting by herself on a bench in a park watching the children play. A young Iranian lady sat down on the bench beside my mother. The young lady noticed my mother’s shawl was not properly covering her head. Her scarf was not meant to be a hijab. The Iranian girl dug out a spare shawl from her handbag and put it over my mother’s head in the proper manner. They only communicated by hand signs. After a while, my mother wanted to walk around. She thanked the young lady and tried to return the shawl. She was very surprised when the Iranian stranger told her to keep it.

That was not just good luck. The next day, my mother was invited by another stranger (an English teacher) to visit her home and have tea with her family. The young teacher even invited her to stay overnight rather than pay for a hotel room. Since my mother was with a tour group, she politely declined.

The day after, a young boy brought over tasty treats for my mother. It was much more than she could ever consume. She was an old Chinese lady sitting in a Tehran park all by herself, being pampered. This was in a country which had been severely sanctioned by Western countries and vilified by Western mainstream media for decades, and the people were made to suffer for it. But everyone treated my mother with the utmost respect as if she were the matriarch of the family. My mother was utterly amazed.

Iranians are the best, this is my mother’s conclusion. But how does that reconcile with her understanding of Iran as promulgated by Western media, which always wag their sanctimonious finger at "evil" countries like China, Russia, and Iran? My mother quickly found her answer. The Iranian government and the religious leadership are evil, but the people are the nicest. That explains the apparent contradiction. Since all human beings suffer from a psychological condition known as “confirmation bias,” which you will notice when some people basically say, “my mind is made up, don’t confuse me with facts,” making it impossible to carry on an intelligent conversation, I would therefore give up and leave it at that.

This is a personal anecdote, of course, and does not represent some statistical research based on measurable metrics. But one may find a moral lesson somewhere we can all learn from.